50 Weekly Check-In Questions for Couples Who Hate Confrontation

If you're reading this, you probably know the feeling: there's something you want to say, but the words won't come out. Maybe you're afraid of starting a fight. Maybe you've tried before and it didn't go well. Or maybe you just don't know how to begin.

You're not alone. Research shows that 73% of relationship issues stem from conversations that never happened. The good news? You don't need to have a dramatic heart-to-heart to improve your relationship. You just need the right questions.

Why Weekly Check-Ins Work

Weekly check-ins aren't about rehashing old arguments or airing grievances. They're about creating a safe, predictable space where both partners can share what's actually going on—before small frustrations become big problems.

Here are 50 questions organized by category. Start with just one or two that feel right for your relationship.

Getting Started (Low Stakes)

These questions are perfect for your first few check-ins:

1. What was the best part of your week?
2. What's one thing you're looking forward to this week?
3. Is there anything on your mind you'd like to share?
4. How are you feeling about us right now?
5. What's something I did this week that made you feel loved?

Connection Questions

Use these to deepen your emotional bond:

6. When did you feel most connected to me this week?
7. What's something you wish we did more of together?
8. Is there a way I could have supported you better this week?
9. What made you smile when you thought about me?
10. How can I show up for you in the week ahead?

Appreciation & Gratitude

Expressing appreciation strengthens your relationship:

11. What's one thing you appreciate about how I handled something this week?
12. When did you feel proud of us as a couple?
13. What's a small thing I do that means a lot to you?
14. Is there something I've been doing lately that you'd like me to keep doing?
15. What's a quality in me that you're grateful for?

Addressing Frustrations (Gently)

These questions create space for harder conversations:

16. Is there anything I did that bothered you that we haven't talked about?
17. Are there any small things piling up that we should address?
18. Did I do anything this week that felt dismissive or hurtful?
19. Is there something you've been holding back because you didn't want to start a fight?
20. What's one thing I could do differently next week?

Household & Logistics

Practical matters affect relationship satisfaction:

21. Are you feeling good about how we're dividing responsibilities?
22. Is there anything on your plate that you need help with?
23. Are there any decisions we need to make together this week?
24. How are you feeling about our finances right now?
25. Is our home feeling like a peaceful space for you?

Intimacy & Affection

Physical and emotional closeness matters:

26. Are you feeling satisfied with our physical connection?
27. Is there a way you'd like to be touched more often?
28. Do you feel like we have enough quality time together?
29. Is there something romantic you've been wanting to do?
30. How can we prioritize intimacy this week?

Individual Well-being

Your partner's personal life affects your relationship:

31. How are you really doing?
32. Is there anything stressing you out that I should know about?
33. Are you taking care of yourself the way you want to be?
34. Is there something you need time and space for this week?
35. How can I support your personal goals right now?

Future Planning

Staying aligned on your shared vision:

36. Is there anything about our future you've been thinking about?
37. Are we on the same page about our goals?
38. Is there a dream or idea you'd like us to explore together?
39. How do you feel about where we are as a couple?
40. What's one thing you want us to do together in the next month?

Repair & Reconnection

For getting back on track after tension:

41. Is there anything unresolved from this week that's still bothering you?
42. Do you feel heard and understood right now?
43. Is there something I need to apologize for?
44. How can we move forward from what happened?
45. What do you need from me to feel better?

Deep Dive Questions

For when you want to go deeper:

46. What's something about yourself you're working on?
47. Is there a fear or insecurity you'd like me to understand better?
48. What makes you feel most secure in our relationship?
49. How have we grown as a couple in the past year?
50. What does your ideal version of our relationship look like?

How to Use These Questions

Don't try to ask all 50 questions in one sitting. Instead:

• Start small: Pick 3-5 questions that feel relevant
• Take turns: Let each person answer the same question
• Listen fully: Don't interrupt or get defensive
• Express gratitude: Thank your partner for sharing
• Follow through: If action is needed, make a plan

When Check-Ins Feel Hard

If these conversations feel difficult, you're not doing it wrong—you're doing something that matters. Here are some tips:

If you're the conflict-avoidant one:

• Remember that silence isn't peace—it's distance
• Start with lower-stakes questions to build confidence
• It's okay to say "I need to think about this" and come back to it

If your partner avoids conflict:

• Create safety by staying calm and curious
• Don't push for immediate answers
• Celebrate small moments of openness

Ready for Guided Check-Ins?

These questions are a great start, but sometimes you need a little more structure. Pulse guides couples through weekly check-ins with personalized questions, conversation prompts, and tools to say what you really mean—without starting a war.

Your first breakthrough might be closer than you think.